30 April 2008

Calvin time again!!!


Just like my sentiments these days!!!

Seven Windows of My Soul

This post is inspired by Seven Windows of My Soul by Marymurtz
Well...mine are not necessarily happy moments. They were turning points from my life, which have made me what I am today.

1) A day in the year 1979 - My brother went to a boarding school and I was studying in the local school in Jammu...someone teased me that Dad had sent the SON to the expensive school and me - a girl to a cheap one. I insisted that I be sent to a boarding school...I was all of 6 years then.
My parents agreed and off I went to Welham Girls High School, one of the most reputed schools in India.
Welhams made me the woman I am today...independent, confident, not afraid to speak my mind, and always ready to stand up for what is right and what I believe in.

2) A day in the year 1989 - I decided that I had had enuff of boarding school and wanted to go and stay with my parents in Jammu and study there. A funny decisions at an age when everyone wanted to move away from their homes...wanted to be on their own.
So I joined BSF School in Jammu...where I met some wonderful people, my best friends...who inspired this earlier post of mine - The Gift Of Friends.
I had remained in touch with one of them all these years...he's been a good friend through all my difficult times...my angel.... who incidentally looks like Brad Pitt (:-)))
With one I have been in touch on and off...but no contact for last 5 years...till one day in March she found me on Orkut. And hats off to her for also finding the absconding one from our group on Batchmates...whom we hadn't heard from for the last 17 years.
Thanks Param...for the efforts to get us all in touch again...and hope we keep it like this till we are doddering old fools!!!
I agree with her when she quotes Richard Bach "Can miles truly separate you from friends... If you want to be with someone you love, aren't you already there? "

3) A day in the year 1991 - I had been very restless since morning...around 4:00 PM Mom came home...looking totally zonked. She'd been in an accident. Her car had been hit by a truck and had gone turtle. Her words...witnesses to the accident hadn't expected her to survive...but she came out with out a scratch.
A little later I realised my dog Sausage was not around. He was known to be an Awaara (vagabond), so everyone just said he'll come back on his own, but I had this sinking feeling and by 7:00 I was hysterical. We went out searching for him and found him crushed to death close by...a small shop owner said a truck struck him around 4:00.
A coincidence???

4) 1994...Diagnosed with a medical problem, visits to the hospital became a routine. A child simply terrified of pricks and medicines was poked around the whole day, given some 18 pills to digest in a single day. What a fuss I made...I would howl and cry...till one day I saw my parents crying. That was it...I decided...no more crying :-)
Overnight I became this brave girl who was smiling and joking around the whole day...a girl with complete faith in God and the doctors who would help her pull through this difficult time...a girl loved and admired by all around her... the doctors, nurses, other patients, family and friends...
No matter what happens...I am now able to smile from behind the tears...I am always able to see the silver lining in the cloud. It wasn't nice being ill…but it made me a strong girl...and man...am I proud of myself...

5) 1995...I had been ill for nearly 6-7 months then...in and out of the hospital...another complication of my problem had caused my blood cell count to fall drastically...it was way, way below the danger mark...the treatment was not working...
I could hear the doctor tell my parents that this was it...they didn't expect me to survive the night and I could be taken home to ease the pain...
My whole life flashed before me...I thought of all the things I should have done, wanted to do...and all the things I should not have done...I decided...I AM NOT GOING TO DIE...
They say it was my will power only...well...I really don’t know...I just know that I made a pact with God...If he gave me a chance I would live a life with no regrets...
I do what I want to do, what I think is right, give my 100% to everything I do cause I don't know if I will get another chance or not!

6) 1996...I had had a successful life saving operation, health was picking up. Life was good as I was continuing my studies and doing well. One day I saw my mom was very sad. Someone had made a comment...that with my illness I was a liability to my parents... and she was so unlucky.
I don't know what made me say to her...You'll be proud of me Mom...and I will work so hard and earn loads of money...more than that ladies children earn...
Even though my interests lay elsewhere and I never wanted to have anything to do with computers, IT WAS the high paying industry and so I decided to do this computer diploma and pursue an IT career...no regrets now...considering I have a friend who says I am grossly overpaid!!!

7) 25th March 2008...the details of this day to follow...

You are welcome to join in this writing prompt. Simply add the links below to the bottom of your post and let Jessica know to add yours to the list!

jen with seven windows of my soul
Jessica with Eleven Windows
Tracy from Tiny Mantras
Defiant Muse from Musings...
LSM with Windows
Mrs. Prufrock
Sugarplum's Mom
jakelliesmom
Arwen
Faking It
Sophisticat
Magpie with windows
Katy with windows
Mary with seven windows of my soul
BA with come to my windows
Slouchy with there are places I remember
Ivy Brown's Stoop

29 April 2008

Is this love

I'm no fan of hard rock...can't even remember where and when I heard this song by Whitesnake - Is This Love...
When suddenly one fine morning I just found myself humming it.... weird...or???
Incidentally didn’t even remember the band's name...but of course Google came to the rescue…

Is this love that I’m feeling,
Is this the love that I’ve been searching for?
Is this love or am I dreaming,
This must be love,
cos its really got a hold on me,
A hold on me...

28 April 2008

Memories, memories, memories...

Last couple of weeks have been reminiscing a lot about my childhood…guess its was getting in touch with long lost childhood friends (thanks to Orkut, Batchmates) that triggered it off.
17 B/D…our house in Jammu…if I close my eyes I can visualise each nook, tile, carpet design of that house…the room I shared with my siblings…the connecting walk-in cupboard leading to my parents room…the dining table where I fought with my sis and bro for that leg piece of the chicken…
Has a study ever been conducted as to how come children don’t feel hot in the scorching sun, as long as they are out playing? I would be out in the hot afternoon sun sitting near the water tank and playing in the water while the maid washed the clothes…and mom begging me to come inside and sleep in the AC…but no …I just wanted to play in the sun…
Ahhhhhh…. the birthday parties…we were filthy rich then so we had lavish birthday parties…the whole town was invited I guess… That whole afternoon the servants would be carrying chairs from the nearby Little Flower Nursery School and then mom would organise the chaat waala, tikki waala, the candy floss man and a couple of more reri(carts) walas who would set up their carts in the long driveway …we had a driveway for at least 5 cars I think….
And the birthday cakes…always elaborate ones…airplanes, trains with 5 bogies, a castle with the works (a princess etc)…
And of course …how can I forget those sunny winter afternoons when we would eat our lunch in the huge garden that we had … gobbling down plates of red carrots and radishes with loads of red chilli powder and lemon…
Then we decided to get dogs…not one, not two but three at the same time…a Labrador (Maggi), a cross between a Spitz and a Sheepdog (Sausage) and a Bakhrwal – its found only in the hills in Kashmir and has wolf like looks and habits (Tommy). I don’t know what made me decide that Sausage was some kind of a performing trick dog…so I would place him on this high windowsill and prod him and goad him to jump off…poor baby….
One wrong business decision and we had to sell off that house. A couple of years later I met a girl in one of the tuitions classes who I became quite pally with …but when I came to know that her family had bought our house, I just didn’t want to even know her. I know…how juvenile of me…but I guess it just hurt so much back then…
That house had and will have a special place in my heart. I used to be in hostel when we lived in that house and I spent only holidays there but still its soo vivid in my memories… whereas the houses that we moved into after that and where I lived for 2-3 years I can’t seem to remember…
Memories, memories, memories...

25 April 2008

(The Complete??) Pride and Prejudice

At some point of time most girls have read (and loved) Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice... me being no exception...
I still remember a bunch of us discussing it with our English teacher...Miss Sen...

This analogy on P & P is hilariously brilliant..wanted me to just grab a copy and read it again...

What Emotion Are You?

Took this quiz on emotions...which tells what Chinese Symbol Are You?
My results...surprising at first...but when I gave it more thought...its true...i guess...



You are Love.You love life, you love all those around you and the world that you live in. You are happiest when you are doing something for someone else or for the common good of mankind.
Take this quiz!

24 April 2008

BITCHDOM

When I stand up for myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch.
When I stand up for those I love, they call me a bitch.
When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts or
do things my own way, they call me a bitch.

Being bitch means I won't compromise what's in my heart.
It means I live my life MY way. It means I won't allow anyone to step on me.
When I refuse to tolerate injustice and speak
against it, I am defined as a bitch.

The same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of
being everyone's maid, or when I act a little selfish.

It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself
to be who I truly am and won't become anyone else's
idea of what they think I "should" be.

I am outspoken, opinionated and determined.
I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!

So try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner
flame, try to squash every ounce of beauty I hold within me.
You won't succeed.

And if that makes me a bitch, so be it. I embrace
the title and proud to BEAR IT.

*******************************************************
Some wonderful acronyms...

B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle anything

B = Babe
I = In
T = Total
C = Control of
H = Herself

B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman

AND THE BEST OF THE LOT...

B = Best
I = Individual
T = The
C = Company's
H = Hired

23 April 2008

The Gift Of Friends

Met a school friend after 17 years...but we just picked up the threads from where we left...it didn't seem that so many years had passed...changes and yet no change at all...

This poem by Karin Schaefer is dedicated to my friends...Param, Rahul and Rohit...

There are days when
bubbling from us comes
the innocent child within,
who giggles at the little things
and wears a silly grin.

There are days when
melancholy comes to
visit for a while;
the mind feels tired, the body weak;
we have no strength to smile.

There are days when
joy abundant
grabs a hold of you and me;
wraps us up in all it's splendor,
lifts us up and sets us free.

There are days when
sorrow wraps us
in its cloak of grief and fear,
'till our hearts ache to the breaking,
'till our eyes can't shed a tear.

There are days when
love bestows us
with its wonderment and light;
with its beauty and its mystery,
its power and its might.

And there are days when
life rewards us
and seems to make amends
by granting us a marvelous gift,
the precious gift of Friends.

22 April 2008

what next?

Google wants to keep and catalogue your DNA...Read about it

21 April 2008

...and ONE month later...

I can’t really believe it’s been more than a month since I posted...
A visit back home, exams and...lots of change going on...
I haven't watched any movies, read any great books, gone travelling across the globe :-(